Uncle Sam, Please Turn the Router Back On

So apparently, the United States government has decided to take an unscheduled vacation. Again. Everything’s on pause parks, paperwork, and, tragically, my dreams of officially becoming a licensed HAM radio operator.

Yes, you read that right. I was all set to join the proud ranks of people who can legally yell “CQ CQ this is Ski on 20 meters!” into the static abyss, but now I’m stuck in bureaucratic limbo because the FCC decided to clock out with everyone else.

It’s like being told you can’t enter the cool nerd club because the bouncer (Uncle Sam) is too busy arguing about the budget to unlock the door. Meanwhile, my radio dreams are sitting in a pile somewhere between “pending” and “good luck.”

The irony? HAM radio exists precisely for when the government can’t get its act together. Disasters, power outages, end-of-the-world scenarios we’re supposed to be the calm voices in the chaos. But right now, we’re waiting for someone to turn the lights back on so we can even join the emergency-preparedness hobby.

At this point, if the shutdown drags on much longer, I’m about to go full retro and order myself a CB radio. No license, no waiting, just pure, unfiltered “Breaker Breaker 19” energy. The government can keep its paperwork I’ll be out here on Channel 9 talking to truckers like it’s 1978.